Saturday, December 1, 2007

WRITERS SCHEDULE CAGED BATTLE


I don't know what Music Boy (Roman White) and The Famous Author (Jack Somebody) were thinking, but I know who I'm picking. Whenever their scheduled caged match takes place--sometime next year at the annual Writers Retreat Workshop Fall confab--I know The Viking will kick the Tennessee Turkey's lilly white ass.

I mean, how much analytical consideration does it take? On one hand you have this peach-faced cherub, on the other...

A viking.

You tell me, folks? Who is going to win?

No, I think the only mystery here is how the heck this whole thing got started. These two former pals have been at each other's throats for years now, and this week tangled seriously in the private quarters of the fair damsel Lorin. Could this woman be at the center of this hot dispute between two old friends?

We called TFA last night to ask him.

"No, this has nothing to do with the fact we're both in love with Lorin. The guy is a bully, pure and simple," TFA said. "I know he looks like a happy, nice, funny, and talented guy..."

(TFA must like cowboy shirts)

"...but he's not. He's really...well, I guess he is talented and funny. But he was very mean to me."

Gee, TFA, get yourself a Kleenx.

3 comments:

Rick Bylina said...

I've got TFA in two rounds. Those horns can put a real dent in most anything. Ouch!

Lolo said...

As said-damsel-and-source-of-romantic-infatuation-on-record, it falls upon me to offer some thoughts on both the upcoming battle of Titans and the incident in question.

On the side of MUSIC BOY: I think Roman could more accurately be accused of prankishness than flat-out meanness. And, if it's any consolation AT ALL, the boy has been leaping out of closets and shadowy corners at me for as long as he's been doing it to the Viking. Only difference is that I grew up with a little brother who made Roman seem pretty staid, so I don't scare easily or often.

On the side of the Viking, however, it is my considered opinion that Music Boy had a lick or two coming. He HAS scared the Viking, in many sneaky and underhanded ways, probably a dozen times since we all started banding together. Three punches for every dozen scares doesn't seem terribly out of line. Even if those punches were pretty darn solid!

That said, I think you fellahs should call it a draw right now, cancel any future battles, and issue in an era of harmony and love between MUSIC BOY and VIKING. Set an example for a new age of understanding.

But that's just my two (or more) cents.

Love to all parties involved!

Lo

Austin Carr said...

I think harmony is a better choice, too. I'll talk to TFA. You guys talk to Music Boy.