Saturday, May 23, 2009

Mothers, Sons & Condoms

We have an anonymous guest blogger today, a New York Times bestselling romance writer who needed to ask her son a delicate question.

Just got off the phone with my son; had a technical question about a love scene I'm writing.  Not that my sweet, innocent 28 year old baby boy is an expert or anything ;-).
 
I asked him if condoms break.
 
And he said, "Of course. All the time." 
 
Now isn't that EXACTLY what every mother wants to hear from her bachelor son?  Oh, the horror!
 
I probably won't be able to write another word today ... or for the next two weeks!

* * *

Having been married for 32 years, I'm a bit out of the loop on what's new and hip in the world of dating.  But in my hubby and two sons, I have the perfect resources for all matters ... male.
 
I believe my son's reply, when I very tentatively told him thank you for the information, was:  "No problem, Mom, other than I'll probably be flaccid for the next month."
 
So, once a month I am going to ask him the most bizarre sexual questions I can think of!
 
I asked both him and his girlfriend the other day what terms are used for ... boinking nowadays.  They both just stared at me and asked what boinking was.  I explained, and then I started writing down all the new common terms.  And then I showed them the book I just got from Amazon - An Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex.
 
I don't know if my son is still seeing that girl ...
 
Okay, we have a very open-minded household.  But I mean, really, if you can only ask your kids stuff that's not embarrassing, what's the fun of having the little snots in the first place?  My son (same one) actually told a woman at a party to "please excuse my mother, she's much better with fictional characters than real people." 

Happy Memorial Weekend, everyone!
 
Well, thank you, Anonymous Mom. You can guest blog anytime!

2 comments:

jnantz said...

Okay, that was just funny!

Austin Carr said...

Mom's novels have humor, but she's known for her bare-chested men.